Wednesday, July 8, 2009


I was in a big, so important I lost sleep the night before, conference call when my iphone buzzed. It was Diana. Over the years, I’ve learned that when Diana calls my office line during the day, I can miss the call. But when she calls my cell, I better answer because something is up. Like blood gushing from Elijah or we lost Grover’s dog collar.

I quickly excited the rank smelling conference room and whispered, “What’s wrong?”

“Don’t you want to talk about Eli going to the zoo?”

I said, “You know that meeting that is the cause of 54 grey hairs on my head? I’m in it now.”

Di quickly replied, “Oh sorry. But call me soon.”

I went back to the meeting, but in the back of my head I was secretly happy. If whatever happened at the zoo warranted a cell phone call, the next blog entry would be a no brainer.

Later, I anxiously called home and asked for the scoop from my reporter in the field. I couldn’t wait to get the lowdown on what hilarious antics transpired earlier.

“He was soooo cute.”

"Uh-huh. What else?"

“He hugged a goat.”


“He was cute.”

Diana is the love of my life. She is a beautiful person, who has reached super-human awesomeness in my eyes.

But she is the worst HamannEggs reporter ever. I think it’s because she loves Eli so much. She is blind to any of the embarrassing, silly and potentially damaging things that make for good HamannEggs entries.

I mean, look at these photos. You can’t tell me there wasn’t at least one thing at happened that Eli will hate hearing about when he turns 18.

That night, I was reading with Eli in his fort and decided to go right to the source.

“Hey Eli, what did you do at the zoo today?”


“What else?”


“I give up.”


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