Easter Moron

On the flight to Costa Rica, it dawned on me much much too late that Easter fell on the first Sunday we’d be at our hotel. Now, we aren’t the most religious people in the world, but we do firmly believe in magical rabbits who crap out colorful eggs around your house.

I panicked, worried that Easter would be forever ruined by having to spend the day in a painfully beautiful beach with unlimited fruit smoothies, unlimited pizza, unlimited monkeys but no egg pooping rabbits.

Diana assured me that we were covered. In fact, the third suitcase we packed, the one that threw us way over our allotted international weight limit, was filled with beach themed Easter goodies for the boys. 

Whew.

On Easter Eve, the subject came up of whether the Easter Bunny would be able to find us in Costa Rica. I scratched my chin and overacted my doubt that he/she would be able to find us. Oh no, maybe you boys will get nothing, heh heh heh. Diana countered my sadism with a prediction of an Easter miracle.

After the boys went to bed, Diana and I realized it would be tough to hide the Easter loot around two incredibly light sleepers who were already trying to catch sight of a six foot tall white plant eating mammal. Diana suggested we simply hide everything in the bathroom. Easter solved.

The following morning, Diana directed the boys to the bathroom and, wow!  Santa, I mean the Easter Bunny showed! Elijah and Luca were delighted and quite happy the Easter bunny knew how much they loved snorkeling.

Eli admitted to us that he had woken up in the middle of the night to hunt for Easter junk, but failed to look in the bathroom. He went to sleep thinking we’d been passed over.

Luca thought this was hilarious and regaled our fellow guests with the story of Easter 2015. His punch line was always, “My moron brother didn’t even look in the bathroom. What a moron, right?”

The guests would nod politely and pretend they got water in their ear.