Tuesday, December 3, 2013

The Luca

There’s a new dance craze sweeping the nation.  It’s called “The Luca.”  Oh, you don’t know how to do The Luca?  Your poor, behind the times soul.  Allow me to instruct you so you won’t feel left out at your next wedding, sock hop or charity dance marathon.

First, put on some jazzy music.  Luca suggests the theme to the cartoon “Rescue Bots.”  Or “Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer.”

Now comes the hard part.  You have to assume The Luca position.  It’s all about the butt.  You’ll want to thrust your butt out as far as you can.  Go ahead.  Try it.  Now thrust your butt out more.  More.  MORE.  Is your lower back in pain?  No?  Your butt isn’t thrust out enough.  Now bend your arms like you are running in place.

All you have to do now is wiggle your butt side to side.  Really try to dart it back and forth.  And swing your arms like you are running.  You’ll also want to look over your shoulder with a poop eating grin.  The poop eating grin is the icing on the cake.

Sometimes if the mood really strikes, you can shout, “Booty butt!  Booty Butt!”

This dance is not to be confused with “The Butter,” a move Diana perfected when she was 4 that involved rubbing your naked butt on people.

Okay.  I’ll leave you to practice The Luca.  And then go to the chiropractor.  

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