Grasshopper

Never in a million years would I have guessed that I’d get tired of a Pixar movie. But after the 40,000th viewing, I just couldn’t take “Up” any longer. Elijah would request it all day every day and, as good as it is, and as much as it should win an Oscar, I wanted to take the delightful old man protagonist and shove him out of his delightful floating house. And burn it to the ground.

So Diana and I tried in vain to get him to switch movies. We went to the store and bought a stack of new-old films. He was mildly entertained by “101 Dalmatians,” but it didn’t take. “Lion King” was…meh. There were even some non-Rick sanctioned movies like “Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs” and the one where the penguins dance. But “Up” was still #1 in the Eli Box Office.

Then he saw “Bug’s Life.”

“Bug’s Life” was Pixar’s follow up to the smash, “Toy Story.” It’s generally considered the worst of the Pixar movies, which still makes it 1,000 times better than anything else out there for kids. And, thankfully, Elijah loved it and now asks for it all day every day.

If you haven’t seen it, “Bug’s Life” is loosely based on the Aesop fable about ants versus grasshoppers. But with lots more hilarious side characters.

But here’s the thing. “Bug’s Life” is surprisingly violent for a G-Rated movie. The grasshoppers are vicious, menacing jerks who, in at least two cases, murder each other.

As an almost 40-year old, I am completely desensitized to movie violence. When I watched it with Eli I said, “They call that a murder? Where’s the blood splatter? Where’s the brain matter?”

Weeeeellll, it seems to have had an affect on Eli. In the form of nightly nightmares. At least twice a night, he wakes up screaming and ranting about grasshoppers. It takes forever for him to settle down. I shudder to think about what is going on in his little brain to get such a visceral and painful reaction.

So, if you are keeping track, Luca, the two month old, can sleep through the night. Eli, the two year old, cannot sleep through the night.

And if you are keeping track, being the sole reason my son has the night terrors makes me the greatest dad in the world.

p.s. I don’t have any photographic evidence of Eli’s terror. But hopefully this photo of his terrified cousin Rory will do.