Peanut

The story goes Diana’s older brother Donny was at a big, important soft drink conference a few years ago when he bit into a delicious, but nut-hiding desert. CUT to him an hour later being wheeled through the hotel lobby on a gurney, right past all the soft drink bigwigs. I imagine them twisting their waxed mustaches and laughing, “Mwoohahahahaha!” While they were punching kittens.

Well, we just found out Luca joined Donny’s ranks. He is officially allergic to peanuts.

Yeah. He’s that kid. The one who ruins school snacks and birthday parties and trips to Thail buffets.

We’d been noticing Luca was getting a little rash any time he ate peanut butter. Our Evanston doctor shrugged it off, but our Denver doctor thought it was alarmed.

Turns out they were both kind of right. Luca is allergic to the thing that makes both beer and chocolate taste better, but not THAT allergic. The doc said he may grow out of it and if he ate a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup he’d most likely just throw up. Throw up deliciousness.

He did recommend we remove all the peanuts from the house and get an emergency allergy injector thing. Which is by far the coolest part.

Let me be clear. I hope I never have to use it. But if I did, it would be just like that scene in Pulp Fiction where John Travolta injects that big headed lady with adrenaline. But without all the Heroin.

Elijah, in his bid to maintain his status as center of all attention, announced that he was also, in fact, allergic to peanuts. That’s good, because he’s got quite a few sunflower seed butter and jelly sandwiches in his future.