Tuesday, May 19, 2009
How To Get In Trouble
Every few days, I ask, beg and plead for Diana to send me new Elijah photos so I can avoid posting blurry ones like yesterday. And for the most part, she comes through like a champ. Cute. Funny. Full of goo.
But inevitably, she will include a photo like today. A naked baby picture. Now, watching my son be naked in the comfort of my own home is great. In fact, I prefer naked Eli to clothed Eli. He’s free and easy in his skin. But at work, naked photos of anyone, let alone someone under the age of 5 is not cool.
Let’s say for instance you are the head of Human Resources and you’re strolling around the office looking for reasons to fire someone. And you happen to look into a certain overpaid creative’s office who is known for making mischief. And you see he is gazing at nude child photo. What do you do? What do you do?
I emailed the naked Eli photo to my art director, Matt, and asked him to add pixels to the image so I could use it in today’s post. A few seconds later he rushed into my office and shouted, “Are you trying to get me fired?”
Thinking this situation wasn’t weird enough, I posted about it on my Twitter account (for those of you unfamiliar with Twitter, don’t worry. It’s a fad that will be over shortly). I immediately got inundated with internet “friend” requests from creeps like “NudeGuy” and “NakedLady69.” In one fell swoop I am now part of the online weirdo world.
And yet, Diana still can’t understand why I refuse to post more nude photos on the blog. I think I am one naked Eli photo away from getting a knock on the door from the good folks at the FBI.