Sunday, September 2, 2007


Improbably, Diana’s condition worsened overnight. September 1st, 2007: The night we will never speak of again. So Diana was couch ridden all day today, unable to move her head without barfing. But she was able to sleep, so I tried to keep her stockpiled with Gatorade and drugs and the keep boy away from scream distance as much as possible.

Eli can go, at max, 2 hours between naps. Naps being one hour. Which means, by my calculations, that I was responsible for one feature length movie’s worth of entertainment every three hours. This is a lot easier than it sounds. Because Eli is only 4 months old. Anything is interesting from the seat of a stroller when you have less memory than my ipod.. Today’s features?

“Trip to Starbucks.” A thriller about a dad who needs coffee, but is running out of time. Rated R for language.

“What’s that car doing?” A delightful romp featuring autos that run through stops signs. And the dad who flicks them off.

“Grover and Penn.” A romantic comedy about a hard working black dog, and the sexy tennis ball that is forever out of his grasp.

“Old Ladies at the Tennis Court.” This is a documentary. A sad, sad documentary.

“Steve and Finn at the Park.” This was a short because Finn got tired of being at the park and Steve had to leave before a fit was pitched.

“Grover and Penn 2: The Edge of Reason.” Pretty much a re-hash of “Grover and Penn.” I think Grover was taking a paycheck.

Okay. I know I asked everyone to send good vibes to Diana. But I really, really need you to send her good vibes today. She’s in a bad way.

p.s. Special Hamanneggs shout out to Pam and Steve, who rescued us by babysitting Eli when Di and I had to go to the E.R. yesterday. The downtown Chicago E.R. was exactly like E.R. on TV, except no one was good looking.

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