2019 Cold

Everyone has the day off due to extreme coldness, but there isn’t much blog-worthy about it. We’ve all sunk into our normal at home routine. Diana is taking the government down one Tweet at a time. Luca and Elijah are digitally murdering their friends and I am sitting in front of the fire pretending to work and listening to The Pixies.

But we’re feeling good. The 2019 cold bug finally left the premises. But not without a fight.

A really nasty cold brings out the true character of whomever it attacks. My Lutheran/German-ness came out big time. I wanted, no, needed to work through my illness. “No…I’m…fine,” I would spit through my teeth while sweating my way through a meeting. The fact that I was contaminating everyone I worked with mattered not. If they were good Lutherans they would come in to work as well. And people would talk fondly of us when we died.

The cold leapt from me to Luca. I know the exact moment this happened. It was when I kissed him on the lips. I couldn’t resist because he was acting so hilarious and cute. My bad. Luca becomes angry when he’s sick. Very angry. He sprawled out on the floor in front of his bedroom and refused any attempts to move him the 8 feet to his bed. He told Diana he did not want her near him, but demanded that I sit on the hardwood floor and listen to him moan. No, I could not read or listen to music. I was being punished.

The cold then made its way to Diana. I know the exact moment this happened. It was when she kissed me on the lips. She couldn’t resist because I was also acting hilarious and cute. Her bad. Diana got it worst of all. She legitimately couldn’t get out of bed for two days. I’m sure the executives at HGTV noticed a spike in “Househunters” viewership. Because when you boil Diana down to her essence from a cold, she is HGTV.

Elijah did not catch the cold, and thus had to attend school. Eli would rather be bedridden and dangerously dehydrated than sit through math. But he hilariously couldn’t catch the bug. He tried kissing everyone infected. He licked our used silver wear. He drank our contaminated Nalgene bottles. No luck. He half-heartedly tried to fake a cold (cough cough), but we all knew he was a big old faker.

I fully expect him to catch it two minutes before our Superbowl party.

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