If this blog has taught me anything, it’s that not every day is going to be perfect. There’s gonna be a day when a five year old pees in your bed. Or you’ll discover pee on the toilet seat at the most inopportune time. What I’m trying to say is pee ruins days, people.
No, I was having a kind of crappy day recently. My planets or Xi was all out of whack. I couldn’t seem to find a way to climb out of my funk, even when the boys were at their cutest: resisting bedtime.
I found myself flat on my back, staring at the ceiling. Elijah and Luca were bouncing on the bed, gleefully oblivious to their dad’s mood. In fact, an immobile dad made a nice obstacle to bounce over and around.
I decided one surefire way to get out of a funk was some forced hugging. I grabbed Luca’s leg as he leapt over me and pulled him hard down on top of me. I started kissing his beautiful little face and he screamed in horror. I immediately felt better. Like real better.
And like all addictive personalities, I wanted more more more. Luckily I had another hand and another bouncing child. I smashed Eli down on top of Luca and started kissing him as well.
Eli reacted in a normal fashion, like a cat thrust into boiling water. He ran shrieking from me, in an attempt to hide in his room. But I am both faster and stronger than he. I took hold of his PJs and covered him with scratchy, stinky dad kisses.
Luca thought I was distracted enough to escape. He was wrong. I found myself completely removed from my funk and laughing hysterically alongside my victims.
We all went to sleep shortly after and at some point in the middle of the night, Luca came into bed with Diana me. He waited until I had left for work to pee all over.
It was a much better day.