Wednesday, March 18, 2015


I think in the long run Elijah and Luca will turn out ok without instruction on how to throw a split-seamed fastball or how to whittle. But I would rather not be reminded of my unmanliness constantly.

In an effort to remind me of my unmanliness, we decided to go visit Diana’s dad, Don.

Don’s garage is a shrine to do-it-yourselfness. Or a brutal dungeon from the “Saw” movie series. There are rusted yard implements or ironically dismembering a secondary character implements everywhere. There’s a stick attached to a couple boards he uses to push snow down his driveway (Because why would someone want to purchase a shovel?).

There’s even a u-shaped wooden contraption that sits on top of his fence that presumably was constructed for the sole purpose of allowing someone to lean against the fence without getting poked by the fence.

Our real purpose for visiting was to make some bricks for our back porch. Why wouldn’t Don know how to make bricks? His patented method is called “Doncrete.”

The process for Doncrete is secret, so I can’t divulge the details in this blog 20 people read on a regular basis. But it allowed Eli and Luca to touch sand, get filthy, and handle liquids that would kill them instantly. They loved it.

My role in Doncrete was to engage in an internal battle not to warn my sons when they are in danger. I didn’t want to nag them constantly when they were clearly having fun. But mostly I didn’t want to look like a sissy in front of Don.

So I’d just warn them of impending injury in my head. “Please don’t put your face on the sander. Don’t put that dye in your mouth. That will take your eye out. Stop swinging that sharpened, rusty blade over your head…”

Like all things not Minecraft related, Eli and Luca got bored and abandoned the Doncrete project in favor of nailing down the exact details of the snacks Diana would be buying them on the way home.

That left me and Don to finish the project. Which we did without incident. I can accomplish manly things thank you very much. But I did fret about getting my new boots dirty.

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