Let’s Talk About Sex

We used to have this birds and bees book that was very graphic and medical, yet still playful in its 1970’s construction paper depictions of dogs, birds and humans doing it.  Whenever we had a question about sex, my mom would ash her cigarette and say, “Look at the book.”

Luckily for Elijah and Luca, there’s premium cable. 

A few months ago, Diana and I were watching “Game Of Thrones.”  This season, there was a controversial scene where a brother forces himself on his sister.  It’s ok.  They were in love.  Anyhoo, right in the middle of the getting busy, I heard a cascading laugh come from our dining room. 

You see, if you’re four years old and want to watch a brother and sister have sex, all you have to do is position yourself in the doorway between our kitchen and dining room.  You get to witness anything your parents are trying to keep from you.

I bellowed, “Get back to bed!” Loud enough to erase any and all full frontal nudity.  I hope.

And the other night, Diana and I decided to watch the Neflix show “Orange is the New Black.”  For its depiction of the harsh environment of minimum security prison and not for the hot lesbian sex.

And sure enough, right during a particularly graphic nipple-y scene I heard Luca’s innocence slip away with a thud.

But like any good Christian, I haven’t asked Luca if he wants to talk about it.  Or if he wants to know how construction paper dogs make babies. 

I figured Eli will tell him everything he needs to know.