Easter Panic

Sorry about the lack of posts this week, gang.  I’ve been in Los Angeles, Portland and New York in the last week or so.  Keep you eyes out for my “taking the family on vacation using frequent flyer miles” post coming soon.

I’m a week late on this story, but I got another Easter gem.

I was home for 48 glorious hours last weekend, thankfully Easter being a chunk of it.  But, most importantly, I got to spend some quality time with Diana.  With my travel schedule and the wine store, we try to soak up as much time with Elijah and Luca as we can.  As a result, our marriage gets booted down on the priority list.  Rick and Diana time is precious.  We had to make last Saturday special.

By ordering Indian food and watching “Homeland.”  Yeah, it wasn’t a five star restaurant followed by the opera, but it counts.

After our curry was finished, Diana bid me a fond goodnight and I watched whatever it is I watch while searching for open bottles of wine Diana tasted for the store. 

Around 11, I decided to call it a night.  I did my usual obsessive house check.  Back door locked.  Front door locked.  Stove burners off.  Did I check the back door?  Better check again.  Oh, and those burners.  Did I mention the back door?

Eventually, I crept up to the boys’ room to watch them sleep.  Oh how I love them.  They are so awesome and sweet and I’d do anything for them.  Especially on these special holidays like Easter.  With the candy and vague religious references and hiding eggs…WE FORGOT TO HIDE THE EGGS!

I raced downstairs and searched for Diana’s Easter stash.  After much cursing, I eventually found it in the car. 

I uncovered baskets, plastic eggshells, candy, some toys and a child’s manicure/pedicure set.  It was a big pink box with a tween on the front.  And Tween toes.  Gross.  There was pink and purple polish and little things you stick on your nails and other things that made me feel weird.

Manicure/pedicure?  Yes, we are gender neutral in our house.  Yes, I support all declarations of the love of pink and ponies and the occasional wearing of Diana’s bras, but somehow the manicure/pedicure thing crossed a line.  Wouldn’t it confuse things if Eli had better nails than his Kindergarten teacher?

I focused on things that made sense to me.  Like stuffing the eggshells with marshmallows.  And eating marshmallows.

I successfully hid the stuff and made a little toy pile for each boy.  Lego Star Wars junk for Eli and a Spiderman bank for Luca.  I contemplated the manicure/pedicure thing.  By pure Neanderthal instinct, I hid the mani-pedi thing in the office, away from the Easter stuff.  I figured if it was something Diana really wanted the boys to have, we could pull a “Christmas Story” and unveil it like a last minute Red Rider BB Gun.

Easter morning came and the boys tried their hardest to contract childhood Diabetes.  They loved the egg searching so much we had multiple hunts throughout the day.

Eventually, I pulled Diana aside and asked what the deal was with the pink box in the office.  She said it was purchased for an auction at Eli’s school.

An Easter miracle.