Friday, August 5, 2011

High Chair

For the last couple of weeks, Diana has been suffering through a disturbing trend with Luca. The minute she turns her back on him when he’s eating, his high chair tray crashes to the floor. BAM! Food everywhere. Grover pounces, Diana scolds and Luca cries.

And the funny thing is, Diana couldn’t figure out how he did it. She’d jiggle the tray, Yank on it and shake it and it would stay locked in place.

But every night for weeks, as soon as Diana leaves the room to check email or answer the phone…BAM! Tray hits the floor. Grover pounces, Diana scolds and Luca cries.

Diana got to the point where she was seeking council from Elijah to see if he knew what was going on. Eli would just shrug and say, “Luca is doing it.”

Sick and tired of cleaning up yogurt and spaghetti, Diana called the manufacturer of the high chair for advice. They asked for 100 photographs to cover their legal butts and asked for $100 for replacement parts.

Diana then began the creepy process of finding a new high chair on Craigslist. But before she made the probably fatal mistake of visiting a Craigslist seller’s house, she just had to know how Luca was unlocking a tray that baffles his 39 year old father.

So she served up the boys a big plate of, oh let’s say spaghetti, and made a big show of leaving the room.

“Whelp, that’s all for me. Going to leave the room now. Not going to spy on you at all. Do whatever it is you do when you’re alone. Bye now! Bye bye!”

Then she stomped her feet in decreasing intensity and then quickly ducked behind the wall. And began spying.

This is what she saw:

Elijah looked around to see if the coast was clear. And then he (I am not making this up) literally tiptoed across the room to Luca’s tray. Then he quickly unhooked the tray and dumped it onto the ground.

“MOM! Luca dumped his tray on the ground!”

Diana leapt up and shouted, “A-HAH!” Busted. Busted. Busted.

Needless to say, he lost his screen privileges.

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