Friday, August 21, 2009

Elijah Town, The World’s Most Dangerous Place.

You have to hand it to the inhabitants of Elijah Town. They’re a hearty bunch. They’ve stuck it out in a community that has, on average, 30 major railway disasters a day. I credit their mayor, Painted Wooden Guy, for funding a pretty crack wooden emergency response team.

Lemmie explain a typical night for the residents of Elijah Town. Last night, the 7:45 train out of Groverville was making the turn out of Mount Mommy when a cry came out of the heavens, “I did it!” Suddenly, the train, all its cargo and at least a quarter mile of track were literally thrown across the town, like toys. Several wooden bystanders were caught in the wreckage, but unbelievably unharmed.

The Elijah Town emergency response team sprung into action. The wooden helicopter, wooden fire truck, wooden police car and several wooden townspeople arrived on the scene. Wooden chief of police kept the wooden gawkers at a safe distance. Within minutes the train, the cargo and tracks were replaced. The crew started back for base when suddenly…

“I did it!”

The entire structure that used to be Googy Bear Bridge collapsed into Grover Lake.

Aaand scene. This morning I was rushing out of the house and Di stopped me. She asked me to put the train set back together because at some point overnight Eli destroyed the entire town.

And by the time I got to the office I had a message waiting for me from Diana asking me how to put the train back together.

I see a tub of wood glue in my near future.

p.s. I don’t have any good photos of Eli destroying Elijah Town, so enjoy this photo of Eli destroying a bowl of ravioli.

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