Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Dead Soon


Elijah and Luca are not very good fighters. When I was young, my older Brother Dave used to mop the floor with me. And Steve and I used to have epic, furious wrestling matches and occasional fist fights.

Eli and Luca are just so sweet, they aren’t built for true brother on brother action. Mostly, they’ll engage in emotional warfare. Lots of “I hate you” and pitting Diana and I against the enemy with a well placed tattle or a frame job.

And very rarely, they’ll actually strike each other with actual physical violence. But it mostly means the occasional pinch or steamroller.

Last Saturday, Eli walloped Luca for real and there tears and sent to your room punishment.

As I was stewing, I remembered an old boss of mine used to say her mom would remind her all she had in life was family in similar situations. So I decided to give the same wisdom to Eli. With a little embellishment so it wouldn’t be total plagiarism.

I peeked into his room and approached the slumped over boy in his bed.

“You know, Eli. Luca is the only person in the world you can count on in this life. Mommy and I aren’t going to live forever. I mean, we’ll be dead at some point. So Luca is all you’ll have.”

I intended the message to be “Love you brother.” But what Eli heard was “Your mommy is going to die soon. Probably today.”

Understandably, Eli burst into tears.

I spent the rest of the day trying to explain that it would be a very long time before mommy or I died (begins to dig hole).  I mean, you can never tell for certain when someone will die (digs larger hole). Heck, you could get hit by a bus tomorrow (leaps into hole and covers self with dirt).

I finally just took him to Chipotle, the solution to all of life’s big problems.


The good news is Eli was a lot nicer to Luca the rest of the weekend.

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