Friday, May 23, 2014


As an employee of arguably the greatest comedy publication in the history of the world, I have an appreciation of yuck yucks. 

Despite the fact that I have zero influence on the actual creation of jokes, Elijah and Luca seem to think I’m part of the actual writing staff.  Responsible for such gems as “Child Bankrupts Make-A-Wish Foundation With Wish For Unlimited Wishes.”

They ask me what jokes I wrote during the day and I have to explain to them that my job isn’t writing jokes, it’s destroying everything the joke writers hold dear by polluting their website with ads for Ritz Crackers and Applebees. 

However, my new career has inspired Eli to start writing his own jokes and pitching them to me.  Naked.

The other night, I was eating dinner and Elijah was standing on our couch, nude.  His genitalia was disturbingly close to my pasta as he said, “Hey dad.  What did the egg say to the chef?”

“I don’t know.  What did the egg say to the chef?  Point your wiener someplace else.”

“You crack me up.’”

Even though the joke was most likely stolen from a popsicle and not very good at all, I laughed uproariously.  Way uproariously. 

I laughed to encourage him to keep writing joke.  To keep telling jokes.  And then get a sitcom deal fifteen years from now. 

Encouraging him to tell jokes was way more important than encouraging him to play baseball, do his homework or really anything else at that moment.

In typical HamannEggs style, my over the op encouragement has resulted in zero jokes since the egg one, but I made my point.

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