Thursday, July 1, 2010

Tour De Rick

Luca is in a weird place right now. He can’t crawl, but is easily bored. If you place him in his bouncy chair or nuclear technician station to treat him like a piece of furniture (guilty as charged), he gets angry. He flaps his little chubby arms and shrieks.

I feel for the guy. But in the mornings when Diana is getting her 15 minute allotment of sleep, I gots stuff to do. Important stuff. Like stare at myself in the mirror. I can’t take time away from my intense preparations to look fantastic to entertain my little friend.

Or can I?

This morning I got an idea. I grabbed the Baby Bjorn and attached Luca to my front for the duration of my post shower activities. A tour de Rick, if you will.

I immediately thought he was my little Kuato, from “Total Recall.” Look, if you don’t get that reference, don’t bother looking it up on the internet. It will just upset you. If you do get that reference, you’re welcome.

We took Grover out for his run, which we’ve done before. So he wasn’t too impressed. Grover was ticked. “What’s this guy doing here? This is our time.”

After that I introduced Luca to the concept of making Elijah’s breakfast. It was slightly harder than I thought to cut Eli’s banana in his demanded slices with a baby hanging on my front. I was very nervous breakfast would include baby toe slices. Next time I will not use a butcher knife. Luca seemed impressed by my knife skills.

Next, we went on to teeth brushing. He liked this quite a bit. Mostly because he could look at himself in the mirror. And what Hamann doesn’t like that? He did get a head full of toothpaste spit, but didn’t seem to care. I worried the Scope fumes would make him stoned. I couldn’t really tell because his expression in the mirror was, “Ohhh wow. I can, like, see myself.”

The final step was cramming my stuff into my backpack. Fairly uneventful. But from his body language I got the distinct impression he was afraid he was going to be one of the items stuffed into the pack.

I eventually put him into his nuclear plant station and let him shriek until he went on the Tour De Diana.

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