Graduation

 

Just like that, Elijah is a high schooler. 

His grade school career ended like most things this year, with a hearty “Meh.” I think there is a virtual graduation ceremony happening. I think we’ll watch, but knowing Eli he’ll have a second screen dedicated to “Grey’s Anatomy” going the whole time.

Eli is almost through all seventeen seasons of the hospital drama. 369 episodes. 15,000 minutes (not counting two hour season cliff hangers). It’s arguably his greatest achievement in grade school. I, for one, am proud of him. Maybe he’ll become a doctor. Or Patrick Dempsey.

We don’t put a ton of pressure on the boys, school wise. As my Dad used to say, “As long as YOU feel like you tried, I don’t care what grades you get.” That bit of psychology scared me into straight A’s. Eli’s approach has been a little more in the “Hey, I woke up. That’s trying” variety.

Like all smart/lazy kids, he has been experimenting with how much to actually try. Midway through the year, his grades slipped into C’s. Diana and I had to apply the requisite threats of no more “Grey’s Anatomy” until grades came up. So he applied foot to the gas ever so slightly and pow, all A’s. 

He’s got it in him. I am hoping a Michelle Pfeiffer in “Dangerous Minds” style teacher will inspire him. My own English teacher once said I was “The greatest waste of potential I have ever seen.” And now I am an Executive Creative Director of a multi-billion dollar packaged goods company. So there.

I’m not worried about Eli in high school. He’s a great kid. He’s sweet smart and genuinely cares about other people. Call me a slacker, but I think that’s all he really needs to know in life. Plus, he hacked into Diana’s email and sent me a note reading, “Hey Rick, let’s get Eli a super expensive Lego for graduation.” He’ll be fine.

Most importantly, when asked in first grade what he wanted to be when he grew up, his response was “Happy.” 

I love you, pal. Congratulations.