Elf on a Shelf

I’m sorry if this seems like both a painfully overwrought and vague post, but Luca sometimes reads the blog and I would like to hold on to what little magic is left in the world.

Have you heard of the Elf on a Shelf? Well, these magical creatures were first, um, discovered by Carol Aebersold, Chanda Bell and Steinwart, who wrote a hugely popular book about them and launched a marketing juggernaut. For any Lucas reading, this is not to suggest that Elves on Shelves are not real. They totally are. Now go practice piano.

The gist is these elves are sent my Santa as scouts to make sure kids are being good, because as we all know, Santa is super busy and his naughty/nice magic can’t be everywhere. That’s just crazy. So these elf guys are the rat finks of Christmas. The most interesting part is they move position during the overnight hours (to get a better angle on naughtiness) and the fun is discovering where the elf is every morning.

I was 100% against this tradition. I felt (incorrectly, Luca) that it was a gross commercialization of Christmas and I fancy myself more in the Charlie Brown wilted tree mold. I’m not even sure I accept Mariah Carey in that sexy Santa outfit.

Like all things I disagree with but never vocalize, Diana and the boys gleefully jumped in. After I saw how hook, line and sinker Luca was, my anti-elf Grinch heart grew three sizes. I was all in.

The only issue is, and this was not part of Carol Aebersold’s book, some elves forget to move overnight. It might be because they get distracted by cable news, or have a glass of wine or simply forget because they are fallible creatures.

When it is your goal to preserve as much magic as possible in an increasingly awful world, this is stressful. Especially when you have to go to Mexico to shoot a commercial.

So, I enlisted Elijah as my assistant elf-checker. Unlike guitar lessons, Eli threw himself into this new responsibility with great enthusiasm. He has really saved the elf’s bacon on multiple occasions.

During the official nighttime routine, Eli and I engage in a silent underground routine consisting of pantomimes and lots of mouthing of the word “elf.”

As of this writing, the elf hasn’t missed a night. There is still magic in the world.