FIVE

Last night, Luca said, “I’m happy to be five tomorrow, but I think I am going to miss being the other ages. Like four.”

I could not agree more, son. My beautiful, funny, imaginative little guy is five today.

We celebrated on Sunday by having 11 five year olds over to our house. We thought it would be easier than taking them to a bouncy castle place or Chuck E Cheese or that gymnastics place where you jump into the foam pit.

The theme for the party was “Rock and Roll.” We got a karaoke machine, got some blow up guitars and a big rock and roll backdrop that made it look like you were playing Wembley Stadium. Eli made a sign that read, “Rock and Rollers only. Just kidding.” We thought of everything.

Except for the fact that 11 five year olds don’t care about Rock and Roll themed parties. The children were content just to wrestle and scream. And scream.

Remember that quote from “True Detective?” Matthew McConaughey said, “Time is a flat circle.” I didn’t understand what they meant until I experienced the sound of 11 screaming five year olds. The party was scheduled for two hours. And after failed karaoke, we still had two hours to go. After pizza, we still had two hours to go. After cake we had two hours to go. The second hand on my nonexistent watch clicked backwards.

After ten minutes of screaming, one of the two girls in attendance began to cry. Expressing what Diana and I were feeling at that time. I immediately volunteered to take her into the kitchen to have a quiet little cupcake decorating party.

Yes, I abandoned Diana to the screaming horde. I’m not proud of it. But at some point it is every man for himself.

Oh Luca. When Eli said you and I are the most alike, I agreed. I feel like you and I are so similar in our silliness, our anxieties, our love of superheroes. You are this wonderful combination of sensitive and outrageous. Bold and timid. Wonderful and wonderful.

I love you pal.